I normally keep
things light ‘n’ crafty here, but because this also serves as a journal of
sorts, and because I suspect I am far from alone in this struggle, I thought I
would post a bit of what our family has been going through lately.
Reece has been
identified as having ADHD – officially. I say officially, because I have
suspected it for quite a while. Well, the ADD part at least. The ‘H’ was a
surprise. While he’s not necessarily “hyper” in the customary bouncing-off-the-walls
sense, his tests showed enough brain impulsivity to qualify him for the ‘H’
part. There could also be an additional learning or processing disorder in the
mix, but we need to wait to test for that until we get a handle on the ADHD.
One step at a time.
Since he has not
ever exhibited any overt behavior problems at school (other than zoning out), Reece
has pretty much flown under the radar. He is not a squeaky wheel, just an
easy-going underachiever. Add that to the current California school budget
debacle that has increased class sizes and cut services down to the bare bones
(with even more cuts yet to come), and we have a gaping loophole in “no child
left behind”. Not to mention two and a half years of disappointing
parent-teacher conferences, grades that just don’t gel with what I know his
potential to be, daily homework battles, and no concrete answers or solutions. His
teachers have run the gamut from suggesting it was a parenting issue, to
chalking it up to “being a boy”, to being just plain baffled by the
incongruities. Even his pediatrician, who is a bona fide, published authority
on the subject of ADD, was in a “wait and see” holding pattern until this year.
I could write about 947 paragraphs on how frustrating it has been, and another 382
on the challenges, behavior problems, and general uproar all of this has
created at home. But I’m not going there, because I am choosing to look
forward.
As much as I hate
kids being labeled with anything, this diagnosis is a HUGE relief for me
amongst the profusion of feelings I’m experiencing. I am sad that there is a
biological issue that makes things harder for my child, and I am concerned
about how teachers and others will judge him with that label attached. ADHD
evokes some unsavory stereotypes…expectations that I don’t want Reece to learn
to live down to. But the bottom line? We finally have an answer – a list of
characteristics that can be attributed to something besides laziness, or
deliberate stubbornness, or something requiring an exorcism. (Kidding on that
last one! Mostly.)
It’s a starting
place, with a plan of action being formed. The specialist we’re working with is
really cutting edge, and Reece is a good candidate for some very exciting
neurofeedback therapy (kind of like a video game he plays with his brain
instead of a handheld controller). It has the potential to circumvent the need
for meds, and retrain certain areas of his brain to function more optimally. It
completely amazes me that testing exists that allows his doctor to pinpoint these
exact areas of his brain, and I feel very lucky to live near one of the few
centers in the country doing this type of therapy.
We are at the
very beginning of a long and daunting process, but it feels like we are finally
moving in the right direction – towards a better understanding of what makes
Reece tick and how to help him be more successful. So among all those other
feelings that come with this diagnosis, I feel truly hopeful for the first time in quite a while.